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Nature Journaling with Expert John Muir Laws

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One warm morning, as my husband and I sat on our front porch, we heard an odd, loud, piercing cry. Soon, a medium-sized hawk flew to the top of the house across the street. It was hard to look away, but I decided I had to try to get my camera to capture the moment.

Of course, as soon as I went inside, the hawk flew away. Despite having watched for a good minute or two, I don’t think I could confidently picture or identify the hawk. What could I have done differently to better remember the details of the moment? What tools would have been great to have at my fingertips?

John Muir Laws

John Muir Laws—an award-winning author, artist, naturalist, environmental educator, and principal innovator of the global nature journaling movement—would have been prepared for the hawk (though both Johns share a passion for nature, Laws is not named after or related to John Muir, environmental advocate and founder of the Sierra Club).

John, who goes by the name “Jack,” would have had his nature satchel nearby filled with his nature journal and the necessary tools to remember this experience. Instead of going inside for his camera, he would have known what to do to “capture” the moment forever.

Jack has spent his career looking for the best tools to connect people to nature and help them fall in love with the world around them. He has dedicated his life to the art of nature journaling and to offering step-by-step guidance to help students and adults feel confident getting started.

In 2022, Jack co-founded the Wild Wonder Foundation, where you can find numerous free resources to help you and your students start nature journaling today!

Not Just for Nature-Loving Teachers!

In the following article, you will learn some of his basics of nature journaling, some techniques and tools to help you get started (or improve your experience) with students, and more about what has inspired Jack to do this work.

We will also explore why this is important to do with students, even if a nature expedition isn’t normally your thing. But don’t be surprised if, after the lesson, you find yourself inspired to do more nature journaling on your own!

Journaling is the single most powerful tool to supercharge your observation, memory, and connection with nature. It is the critical foundational habit of being a naturalist and scientist.

John Muir Laws

Laws argues that the observation notebook is a “fundamental thinking tool” that helps students observe more carefully and remember more effectively. He says, “Keeping a journal of your [nature] observations, questions, and reflections will enrich your experiences and develop gratitude, reverence, and the skills of a naturalist. The goal of nature journaling is not to create a portfolio of pretty pictures but to develop a tool to help you see, wonder, and remember your experiences.”

He believes everyone can develop these observation skills and that you do not have to be an artist or a naturalist to do this. He continues:

I believe that the process of attention is what makes you fall in love with the world. It is through attention that we create memories, but those memories will change over time so keeping a notebook and documenting what you’re seeing is a very powerful way to help you preserve the integrity of those memories as a scientist… the notes are data, a record of what I see.

John Muir Laws

During my interview with Jack, it became clear that his passion would benefit FOSS users by helping teachers better support students with their science notebooks and enriching many of the outdoor experiences built into our program. As you read on, consider how these observation skills could be used outdoors to help you dig deeper into the schoolyard activities from your Investigation Guides.

What is Nature Journaling?

Observation notebooks, nature journals, science notebooks—Jack calls them nature journals, but all terms are relevant—are all about getting students outside to record what they see. Students are encouraged to look very carefully at unique and mundane things they find and to slow down and connect with the natural world. Observations lead to deeper understanding and more lasting connections.

The goal of nature journaling is not to create a portfolio of pretty pictures but to develop a tool to help you see, wonder, and remember your experiences.

John Muir Laws

Jack believes the step-by-step strategies used to enhance observations are tools that provide a road map to making stronger, longer-lasting memories. They help people connect more deeply with nature. He says, “Looking hard isn’t enough. Observation isn’t something in the eyes; it engages your brain in a dynamic way to remember what you observe—intentionally engage your curiosity. Curiosity is a skill you can enhance and develop if you’re deliberate about it.”

How to Get Started with Nature Journaling

It’s probably best to start observing things that will not fly, hop, or run away. Start with acorns, seeds, leaves, or flowers. When you want to capture an animal, they tend not to stay still for you or your students, so Jack recommends speaking out loud about what you see.

As an example, the following is what I could have said about my hawk (I will write an X where I cannot remember specific details):

The hawk is about 28 cm high, brown with only a few white feathers on the back, the white feathers look like stripes, its beak is X color, with a sharp point, the beak is about the size of X, the eyes are X color and located on the X of its head. Its tail feathers are X long. Its head swivels to the left and right about 180 degrees. It is resting on the peak of Sean and Carol’s house with a small bird in its talons. What is it using to balance itself if the bird is in its talons? I wonder how long it will take to eat the bird? What parts of the bird will it eat? Will it use the feathers for something else?

Saying these things out loud is a “powerful brain trick” and would have helped me form a picture in my head and, in turn, remember the details longer. Jack recommends thinking about patterns, shapes, sizes, and other basic details. When the bird flew away, I would better remember these things as I pulled out my notebook from my satchel to start my nature journal.

With a class of students, everyone would simultaneously whisper their observations to themselves. This can be practiced indoors and may seem silly initially, but it works.

nature journal with sketches and details of birds

The nature journal entry will be a conversation between a natural phenomenon and your brain. This process creates a time to slow down and process things. Jack recommends that teachers emphasize three languages in nature journaling: words, pictures, and numbers. Of course, these would look very different with younger kids than older students, but you will judge what your kids can handle.

  • Words: Record short thoughts and ideas (no need for full sentences or correct spelling). Write what you see, hear, feel, and wonder about, as well as any questions you may have. Include the location, weather, and time of day.
  • Pictures: Include drawings, diagrams, maps, and sketches (color is not necessary, but useful). For drawings, start with the general shape and proportions of what you see and add details from there.
  • Numbers: Use the language of numbers. Count, estimate (especially when the numbers are too great to count), measure, and note the temperature. Record the time and date.

Jack believes that the tools you include will influence how students observe and will affect the things students see. Students need easy access to simple tools when on a nature walk, in the schoolyard, or on a field trip to a natural place.

First, you don’t want to have to go inside to get something you forget (because the hawk will fly away!). You also don’t want everything in a backpack or your teacher’s bag because it takes too long to take it off or dig it out. Students need immediate access to their tools.

Cloth shoulder satchels are ideal (Jack and his team designed and tested this Custom Nature Journaling Bag). But if you’re like most teachers and don’t have a budget for something like this, consider making satchels for students using zip bags, as FOSS describes in the Taking FOSS Outdoors chapter. Students should try to include a small ruler, a magnifying lens, pencils, and a notebook. The tools you have will change the way you observe as they affect the things you see.

nature journal with sketch drawings and details of mushrooms

Jack cautions that the first time you introduce a new tool or procedure, it will be a novelty for students and may be a distraction. Students will want to investigate that new tool and overuse it. It may take time until students begin using the tool without being distracted, but the only way to overcome that is to use or do it regularly. Anticipating that this will be an issue for students will best prepare the teacher to expect certain behaviors.

The first time you do some nature journaling with students, the experience itself will be a novelty and a distraction. Likewise, taking students outside for an outdoor activity for the first time will be a novel experience. The Taking FOSS Outdoors chapter highlights many teaching strategies to improve the outdoor experience.

Learn More: Science Instruction Outside of the Classroom

Why Should People Nature Journal?

People should do this because the world is infinitely fascinating and beautiful. You see so much more when observing through the journal. The ability to hold things in our head is really limited. Journaling gets us past the limits of our brain’s capacity of how much information it can store and hold and manipulate at one time. The journal frees up our brain, once you’ve got all of this down on paper, your brain is freed up to operate at more sophisticated levels.

John Muir Laws

Nature journaling is a great way to reach out to children. Jack explains, “I was shut down academically and had come to believe, because I’m dyslexic and had trouble spelling and writing sequences of numbers, that I was ‘stupid.’” But a high school biology teacher saw past this by engaging Jack, believing in him, and introducing him “to the joy and fun of scientific exploration.”

nature journal entry from fiona gillogly showing sketches and observations of acorns and leaves

The FOSS staff works with science educators from across the country, and we know that many of you are meeting the young “Jacks” of the world and believing in them. You help them see the wonders of classroom science, the schoolyard, and the greater world around them.

We believe that finding time to use nature journals with your students will make them more productive thinkers, better observers, and more peaceful, nature-loving young people.

Young Nature Journaler Over the Years

The nature journal pages you’ve seen in this article were from a journal by Fiona Gillogly. At that time, she was a 13-year-old seventh-grader in Applegate, California. She had been doing this for only five months when she shared with us this magical experience she had in nature with her journal:

In August, I was back in Sierra Valley with my new best friend and nature journaling buddy, John Muir Laws, also known as Jack. We worked in our journals and sketched the birds we saw, including American bittern, sandhill crane, and great egret.

As we walked up to the steel bridge, it was dusk, and my mom called out “Barn owl! Barn owl!” and Jack and I saw it flying along the edge of the bridge. We were mesmerized. Then Jack said, “I just saw that barn owl fly under the end of the steel bridge.” We gave each other one look, and since we are crazy nature people, we went running to the end of the bridge where he saw it go.

Jack climbed down over the edge of the bridge and peered in under the large rock piles around the base of the bridge. It was almost dark by then, so Jack pointed a flashlight into a crevice in the rock pile. He looked up at me, and whispered excitedly “FIONA! You NEED to come down here RIGHT NOW!” So my mom and I climbed down and peeked in, and there, not two feet back in the hole, looking right at us, sat the spectacular barn owl. Of course, we both went straight to our journals to draw and write about it. This evening was a truly miraculous occurrence that I will never forget.

Fiona Clare Gillogly, Birder, Artist, Nature Journaler, and Advocate for Nature

Fiona met Jack on her 13th birthday, and Jack immediately saw the fire and curiosity Fiona had for nature. Fiona is now 21 and has continued her passion for nature journaling. You can see some of her recent pages, read her essays, and see her talks on nature journaling at fionasongbird.com.

To learn more about taking science instruction outside and helping your students engage with nature, check out the FOSS Next Generation modules for grades K-8!

This month on the It’s Time for Science podcast, we had both John Muir Laws and Erica Beck Spencer come in and tell us more about nature journaling and outdoor science. Listen below!

erica beck spencer image

Erica Beck Spencer

Erica is a curriculum specialist with the Full Option Science System Project (FOSS K-8) and spearheaded the major Taking FOSS Outdoors initiative. In addition to developing the program, over the course of her career with FOSS, she has worked with over 50 districts and tens of thousands of educators on implementing the FOSS program. She has taught a wide variety of educators, ranging from kindergarten paraprofessionals to train-the-trainer sessions in diverse settings, including major urban adoptions, rural schools, and even international trainings in Egypt and Italy. She has served on the board of directors for the Maine Environmental Education Association, Rippleffect, and will be the board president for the Maine Math and Science Alliance. She holds a Master of Education degree from Lesley University. Prior to working for FOSS, she taught in urban schools in Cambridge, Boston, and Portland, Maine.


image of environmentalist john muir laws writing in a nature journal

John Muir Laws

A principal innovator in the global nature journaling movement, John Muir Laws is an award-winning naturalist, artist, scientist, educator, and the author and illustrator of several books, including The Laws Guide to Nature Drawing and JournalingThe Laws Guide to Drawing Birds, and The Laws Guide to the Sierra Nevada. He is also the co-author of How to Teach Nature Journaling. He is co-founder and president of the Wild Wonder Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to encouraging nature connection and conservation through attention, curiosity, art, science, and community. 





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Health

Zucchini Baby Food Puree | The Picky Eater

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This post may contain affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Please read my disclosure.

Perfect for busy parents looking to make their own baby food, my easy zucchini baby food with apples and carrots is a delicious combination your baby will love! Both zucchini and carrots are sweeter veggies, and when paired with apples, it turns a simple zucchini puree into a healthy sweet treat for your little one.

Zucchini baby food puree in a glass jar with a spoon.

Veggies mixed with fruit are always a hit in my household, and this zucchini carrot and apple puree is a favorite. When my kids were young, I used to mix this zucchini baby food with their oatmeal in the morning and they loved it!

While you can easily take zucchini and make a one ingredient puree, I always loved experimenting with different zucchini combination baby food to see what my baby enjoyed most. I find that mixing it with a couple of other fruits and veggies makes babies love it even more!

So if you haven’t tried making a zucchini carrot puree for your little one, my simple recipe is easy to prepare, nutritious, and delicious. I guarantee you will have one happy baby after giving them this smooth puree!

My zucchini baby food recipe is a great first food! Babies can enjoy zucchini as young as 6 months old when they begin to try other solid foods (source). I gave my kids this courgette baby puree when they were both 6 months old, and they totally loved it!

Baby food recipes with zucchini are packed with vitamins and minerals. Zucchini is a great source of beta-carotene, which converts to vitamin A, supporting the immune system and improving eyesight. Additionally, it’s rich in vitamin C, aiding in iron absorption, which is crucial as babies begin to lose iron around 5 months old. It also contains vitamin B6, essential for brain development (source).

My zucchini and carrot puree for baby is not only healthy but also delicious. It combines the natural sweetness of fresh zucchini, carrots, and apples, creating a flavor that your little one will love with every spoonful.

I’ve also found that using zucchini can be of the best stage 1 baby food recipes because it’s so mild and typically not on the list of common food allergies.

Plus, it’s the most versatile and easiest baby food zucchini recipe ever! You don’t need any fancy equipment or expensive ingredients to make this – just a pot and a blender or potato masher and you’re all set.

My zucchini puree is a simple baby food recipe you can use in a variety of ways – it’s super customizable based on your baby’s needs and preferences.

Not only that, but baby food with zucchini keeps well in the fridge and freezer! My recipe makes 16 servings, so I would often make it in big batches to have on hand, making meal planning for my kids much easier and more efficient!

Latest Recipe Video!

🥘 Ingredients

My homemade baby puree with zucchini is ready in minutes with minimal effort. All you need is a handful of simple ingredients and a good blender! Scroll down to the recipe card at the bottom of the post for more details.

Ingredients for zucchini baby food recipe on a white background.

Organic Zucchini: This mild flavored veggie forms the base of my zucchini carrot baby food! I prefer to use the smaller, skinnier zucchini for baby food because they have fewer seeds. You could also make this recipe with yellow squash or summer squash if you don’t have zucchini.

Organic Carrots: They add sweetness and a smooth texture to the puree. You can use either large carrots or baby carrots.

Organic Fuji Apples: I love using Fuji apples for their sweet and crisp flavor. They are excellent for baby food puree as they easily cook down and add natural sweetness.

Water: You need liquid to help the fruits and veggies cook down. I use 12 ounces of water so that the puree ends up with a smooth and easy-to-consume consistency.

🔪 How To Make Zucchini Baby Food

Learning how to puree zucchini for baby food is really easy! It only takes a few simple steps and the blender does all the hard work for you.

Watch my video below to see the step-by-step process of making zucchini puree for baby.

Prep Your Ingredients: To begin I wash all the produce. Then I cut the zucchini in half lengthwise and cut each half into 8 pieces. Next, I peel the carrots, cut them in half lengthwise, and then cut each half into 8 pieces. For the apples, I cut them in half, remove the seeds and stem, and cut each half into 8 pieces.

Cook The Produce: In a large pot, I add the carrots and water. Then I turn the heat to high and cook for 8 minutes, stirring occasionally. Next, I add the zucchini and apples and cook for another 3-5 minutes.

zucchini apples and carrots in a pot

Puree The Mixture: When done I pour the cooked produce and water into a blender. Then I blend everything until smooth or the desired consistency.

puree in blender

Serve or Store: After blending, if I’m not serving the pureeright away or using it all within a week, I pour it into ice cube trays. Then I let it cool, wrap or cover the trays, and put them in the freezer. 

Note: Thaw in the fridge the night before use, or thaw by putting the small cubes in a bowl over a bowl of hot water on the counter to defrost.

Zucchini Baby Food Puree in ice cube trays

My #1 Secret Tip or making my zucchini baby food is to use a high-speed blender, not a food processor. A high-speed blender will pulverize all the ingredients into a super smooth consistency. A food processor might leave the puree slightly chunky or grainy.

Other Tips To Keep In Mind:

  • Use Organic Produce If You Can: When making your own homemade baby food recipes, I highly recommend using organic produce to reduce pesticide exposure for your baby. No matter how thoroughly you wash your fruits and vegetables, there will still be some pesticide residue (source).
  • Proper Storage: Before using the zucchini, make sure it’s completely dry. Then place them in a paper bag and store them in the vegetable drawer of your fridge. Don’t put them in a plastic bag – it will cause your courgette to become slimy.
  • Steaming Option: Instead of boiling, you can also use a steamer basket or slow cooker. To steam zucchini for baby food first dice everything into small chunks. Next, bring 1 inch of water to boil in a pot with a steamer basket, add the produce, cover, and steam for 5 minutes until soft. Then put the steamed zucchini and veggies into a blender with a little water and puree. 
  • Speed Up Cooking: For quicker cooking time, cut the vegetables and fruit into small pieces to help them cook down more quickly.
  • First-Time Feeding: If this is your first time serving zucchini to your baby, monitor for any allergic reactions over the first 1-3 days. Once you confirm there are no allergies, you can start mixing zucchini with other purees.

✔️ How To Choose Zucchini

Zucchini, also known as courgette in some countries, is the exact same vegetable. When selecting zucchini, you want to look for vibrant, bright green ones that are firm and free of bruises or blemishes.

Size is important too. I prefer smaller, skinnier zucchini for baby food because they have fewer seeds in the center. Choose small to medium-sized zucchini, as they have less water content and more flavor compared to larger ones. Larger zucchinis tend to be watery, less flavorful, and full of seeds.

📖 Variations

One of the best things about this recipe is how customizable it is. When creating your own variations choosing what to mix with zucchini for baby food is fun. Here are some of my favorite zucchini baby food combinations:

Use Different Veggies: This is just a short list of some other vegetables that would taste great with my zucchini puree.

Change The Fruit: Use a different type of apple in this delicious puree, or add one of these other fruits for a fun way to change things up!

Add Spices Or Herbs: All zucchini puree combinations for baby are delicious with the addition of herbs and spices such as basil, thyme, rosemary, parsley, garlic, or lemon. If you want a sweeter flavor, try a pinch of cinnamon or nutmeg. It’s a great way to expose babies to new flavors. 

Add Breast Milk or Formula: When considering what to mix zucchini with for baby, it can be as simple as just mixing in some breast milk or organic baby formula to thin out the consistency of the puree right before serving. Do not add breastmilk or formula before freezing the baby food as formula is not meant to be frozen, and breastmilk has a different shelf life in the freezer.

Make A Single Ingredient Puree: If you don’t have everything on hand to make carrot zucchini and apple puree, no problem! You can make plain zucchini puree! Just add the zucchini and a few tablespoons of water to a pot, boil, and then puree. Keep in mind that zucchini has a lot of water, so if you don’t add the carrots and apples, you may need less water.

Make Baby Finger Foods: Turn my courgette puree for baby recipe into finger food instead. For older babies, or babies who are using baby led weaning foods, you can cut the zucchini into match-sized sticks, and roast them in the oven with a little bit of olive oil. They turn into zucchini “fries” and are a great way for your baby to experiment with gumming soft foods.

🧊 Storage Directions

Fridge: If you plan to use the entire batch of zucchini baby puree within a week, I recommend just transferring it to an airtight container and storing it in the refrigerator. Simply scoop out individual servings as needed. 

Freezer: For longer storage, pour the cooled puree into ice cube trays, cover, and freeze until solid. Once frozen, I always transfer the cubes to a ziplock freezer bag and label it with the date. The cubes can be stored in the freezer for up to 3 months. 

Thawing: To thaw, I normally place the desired number of cubes in the fridge overnight. Alternatively, for quicker thawing, you can place the cubes in a bowl over another bowl of hot water on the counter. 

Reheating: Gently warm the thawed puree in a saucepan over low heat or in a microwave-safe dish in the microwave. Stir well and test the temperature before serving to ensure it’s not too hot for your baby.

❓Recipe FAQs

Can babies eat raw zucchini?

No, do not give your baby raw zucchini. They cannot mash it with their gums, and the small pieces can be a choking hazard.

Do I need to remove the seeds? Can babies eat zucchini seeds?

You don’t need to remove the seeds – it is fine for baby to eat zucchini seeds when they are pureed with the rest of the zucchini.

Should I peel zucchini for baby food?

You might be wondering whether you need to peel the zucchini skin before cooking it. The answer is no – you definitely don’t need to peel the zucchini. The zucchini skin has a ton of nutrients and becomes super soft when cooked, which means it’s ideal for pureeing.

Zucchini baby food served in a glass jar with a spoon.

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📋 Recipe Card

Zucchini Baby Food Puree

My zucchini baby food puree with apples and carrots is a delicious combination your baby will enjoy! Zucchini and carrots are on the sweeter side in the vegetable category, and when paired with apples it becomes a healthy sweet treat for your little one!

Prep Time10 minutes

Cook Time20 minutes

Total Time30 minutes

Course: Baby Food

Cuisine: American

Diet: Gluten Free, Low Calorie, Vegan, Vegetarian

Servings: 16 ounces

Calories: 22kcal

Shop Ingredients on Jupiter

  • Store zucchini in a paper bag in the fridge to keep fresh.
  • If you don’t want to boil everything in a pot, you can also use a steamer basket or slow cooker to cook down the vegetables and fruit.
  • Cut the vegetables and fruit into small pieces to help them cook down more quickly.
  • If you plan to use this entire batch of zucchini baby food within 1 week, you can transfer the entire puree into one airtight container and place it in the fridge. Then, just scoop out individual servings when you’re ready to feed your baby.
  • 1 ice cube = 1 oz of food

Adapted from BabyLove

Calories: 22kcal | Carbohydrates: 5g | Protein: 1g | Fat: 1g | Saturated Fat: 1g | Sodium: 13mg | Potassium: 144mg | Fiber: 1g | Sugar: 4g





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The Hidden Time Bomb That Will Destroy Your Marriage and The Secret for Defusing It

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Too many marriages are failing today and even trained marriage counselors don’t know why. I have been a marriage and family therapist for more than fifty years and the headline on my website “Confessions of a Twice-Divorced Marriage Counselor” introduces you to what I’ve learned in my own life and what I have done to help thousands of men and women recognize that divorce is not the answer. Spoiler alert: My present wife Carlin and I have been married for 45 years now and our love grows stronger every year.

            I could write a lot and tell you the full story, but I’m guessing you’d appreciate my getting right to the point and telling you what the time bomb is and the secret for defusing it.

            The hidden bomb causes changes in our brains when we grow up with a “father wound” and the secret for defusing it is to change the false beliefs that were planted in our brains that undermine our relationships.

            Although this deadly time bomb can explode at any time in a marriage, mid-life couples are particularly vulnerable. Susan L. Brown is Director of The National Center for Family & Marriage Research. In a recent article, “The Graying of Divorce: A Half Century of Change,” she offers the following facts:

  • People over 50 are divorcing in record-breaking numbers, and three to four-family generations feel the effects.
  • 1 in 4 persons who divorce in the U.S. is over 50, contrasted to less than

1 in 10 in 1990.

  • As the divorce rate for adults over 50 soars, so does the number of adult children experiencing parental divorce.
  • In their book Second Chances: Men, Women and Children a Decade After Divorce, Sandra Blakeslee and Judith S. Wallerstein tell us, “Divorce is deceptive. Legally it is a single event, but psychologically it is a chain – sometimes a never-ending chain – of events, relocations, and radically shifting relationships strung through time, a process that forever changes the lives of the people involved.”

Understanding and Healing The Family Father Wound

            Although I had written a number of books that helped me understand what causes relationships to fall apart, including international best-sellers including Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places, Surviving Male Menopause, The Irritable Male Syndrome, and The Enlightened Marriage: The 5 Transformative Stages of Relationships and Why the Best is Still to Come, it wasn’t until I tackled the “father wound” that the final pieces of the puzzle fell into place.

            In my book, My Distant Dad: Healing the Family Father Wound, I say,

“There is one problem that surpasses all others in its impact on men, women, and society. It is the father wound. We focus on the importance of mothers in determining the well-being of children. Without the support of their fathers, men become disconnected from their true selves, feeling that others are controlling their lives. The father wound may be the most pervasive, most important, and least recognized problem facing men and their families today. The father wound isn’t restricted to men. Women also suffer from the father wound.”

            As I recount in the book, my father wound began early. Like many men, my mid-life father had become increasingly depressed when he couldn’t make a living to support his family. Although there were many system problems that led to his losing his job, he blamed himself and felt like he was a failure as a husband and a father. When I was five years old, he took an overdose of sleeping pills.

            Fortunately, he didn’t die. He was committed to the state mental hospital, where the “treatment” of the time was inadequate at best and his condition worsened. I grew up wondering what happened to my father, when it would happen to me, and what I could do to prevent it from happening to other families.

            According to the National Center for Fathering,

“More than 20 million children live in a home without the physical presence of a father. Millions more have dads who are physically present, but emotionally absent. If it were classified as a disease, fatherlessness would be an epidemic worthy of attention as a national emergency.”

            I grew up believing that there was something wrong with me, that somehow I was responsible for my father’s depression and suicide attempt. We now know that “Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)” including the loss of parental support can impact our brain chemistry and the ways we perceive ourselves and our world.

            As I was writing the book, My Distant Dad, I thought I had healed my own father wound and could now share what I learned with others. One of those who found my book helpful was Iyanla Vanzant, the world-renowned spiritual teacher and thought leader, and host of Iyanla Fix My Life on the Oprah Winfrey Network. She said,

“Millions of us grew in a home with a father who was distant, absent, rejecting, or dysfunctional. Jed Diamond’s magnificent healing journey offers us a story of hope, reconciliation, and redemption where we can finally come to peace with our father wound and find real lasting love in our lives.”

            It wasn’t until the book was nearly complete that I realized there was another father wound that was missing. I knew my mother’s father, John, had died when she was five years old (the same age I was when my father went into the mental hospital, but she never talked about when happened or how it impacted her life.

            The wound she never dealt with caused her to marry and divorce three times. I believe, like many, she was “looking for love in all the wrong places,” always searching for the father she had lost, but never realizing it. Like many women she had an unhealthy emotional attachment to me, her son, and was never able to have a successful, long-term marriage.”

            I realized that all the women I had loved the most had suffered from having a father wound: My first wife’s father died when she was seven years old. My second wife’s father couldn’t handle her developing womanhood and totally distanced from her when she moved into puberty. Even my present wife, Carlin, lost her father through divorce.

            Whether you’re a man or a woman I think we all can resonate with the words of fatherhood expert Roland Warren. “Kids have a hole in their soul in the shape of their dad. And if a father is unwilling or unable to fill that role, it can leave a wound that is not easily healed.”

            Of course the healing and defusing of the bomb takes time. I have developed a program that I use with my private clients. You can learn about it and get the course here.

            There is another course that is excellent called “How to Diffuse the Divorce Bomb,” developed by Steve Horsmon, founder of Good Guys to Great Men. You can check out that course here.

            I write a new article every week for those who are part of our MenAlive community. If you are not a subscriber, you can become one here.



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Health

Ticks and kids: What parents should know – CHOC

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How to protect against ticks – and what to do if you spot one on your child

Enjoy the great outdoors, but don’t forget about the threat of ticks. Ticks can carry diseases, including Lyme disease.

The good news is that, according to the Orange County Mosquito and Vector Control District, the county has not had a confirmed case of Lyme disease acquired from local ticks. The district also routinely tests for Lyme disease in local tick populations.

Just the same, it’s good to remain vigilant – especially when traveling to places with more risk. Here, Dr. Olga Guijon, a CHOC pediatrician, answers common questions about kids and ticks.

How can I protect against ticks?

Ticks don’t have to become a problem if you follow some basic tips.

Wardrobe and accessories matter

  • Wear light-colored clothing to help you see ticks more easily.
  • Wear closed shoes or boots, long-sleeve shirts, and pants.
  • Tuck pant legs into socks or shoes for extra protection.
  • Pull long hair back or wear a hat.
  • Clothes also can be treated with a specific insecticide (like permethrin) to help prevent bites.

Choose locations wisely

  • When hiking, stay on trails and avoid bushy areas with tall grass and leaf litter.

Take post-hike measures

  • Wash kids’ skin with soap and water when they come back inside. If you’ve been in an area with ticks, wash all clothes in hot water and tumble dry on high heat before they’re worn again.
  • Check your kids each day for ticks — look in and behind ears, in the groin area, behind the knees, in hair, in eyebrows and eyelashes, and under the arms.
  • Also remember to inspect pets, clothing, and camping gear, including backpacks and sleeping bags.
  • If you find a tick, remove it right away.

Are bug sprays with DEET safe for kids?

Insect repellents containing DEET have been tested and approved as safe for kids older than age 2 months. In addition to ticks, DEET helps protect against mosquitoes, biting flies, chiggers, and fleas.

However, while DEET is approved for babies 2 months and older,  parents ought to apply sparingly in children under 2  years of age as their skin is different compared to older children.

But be sure to read all labels and take care when you use them:

  • Choose a repellent with a 10% to 30% concentration of DEET (look for N,N-diethyl-m-toluamide on the label). The higher the concentration, the longer it lasts.
  • Use lower concentrations (10%) if kids will be outside only for an hour or two.
  • If they’re outside longer, consider using a repellent with up to 30% DEET, which lasts around five hours.
  • Do not apply a repellent with DEET more than once a day.

DEET can be put on exposed skin, as well as clothing, socks and shoes. But don’t use it on your child’s face, under clothing, on cuts or irritated skin, or on the hands of young children. Here are some other tips for applying DEET:

  • Do not use a single product containing both sunscreen and DEET. Sunscreen needs to be reapplied often, while DEET should not be used more than once a day.
  • DEET concentrations higher than 30% are not more effective and the chemical (which is absorbed through the skin) in high amounts can be toxic. Follow the directions on the label.
  • Do not apply repellent to kids’ hands because they could swallow it if they put their hands in their mouth. It also can irritate the eyes if they touch them.
  • Don’t spray the repellent anywhere near the mouth.
  • Apply the repellent in an open area so that you and your child don’t breathe it in.
  • Wash kids’ skin with soap and water when they come back inside, and wash all clothes before they’re worn again.

Other bug repellents don’t contain DEET. The US Environmental Protection Agency has a list of approved repellents. Their tool can help you choose the right one for your family.

What to do if you find a tick on your child

First, don’t panic. It’s true that Lyme disease is the most common tick-borne disease in the United States. But your child’s risk of developing Lyme disease after being bitten by a tick is very low.

To be safe, though, you’ll want to remove the tick as soon as possible. The risk of infection rises 24 to 48 hours after the tick attaches to the skin.

Tick removal steps

  • Step 1: Use tweezers to grasp the tick firmly at its head or mouth, next to the skin. Use a magnifying glass, if you have one, to see the tick clearly.
  • Step 2: Pull firmly and steadily until the tick lets go of the skin. Do not twist the tick or rock it from side to side. Be careful not to compress the ticks body. If part of the tick stays in the skin, don’t worry. It will eventually come out on its own.
  • Step 3: Release the tick into a jar or zip-locked bag.
  • Step 4: Wash your hands and the site of the bite with soap and water.

Never use petroleum jelly or a hot match to kill and remove a tick. These methods don’t get the tick off the skin, and can make it burrow deeper and release more saliva, which makes it more likely to pass a disease.

What are the signs of tick-related diseases?

Most tick bites are harmless and don’t need medical treatment – especially in Orange County, CA. But some ticks (like the deer tick, wood tick and others) can carry harmful germs that cause diseases like Rocky Mountain spotted fever and Lyme disease.

Here are some things to look for:

  • a red bump ringed by an expanding red rash, which looks like a bull’s-eye (Lyme disease);
  • red dots on the ankles and wrists (Rocky Mountain spotted fever); or
  • flu-like symptoms such as fever, headache, tiredness, vomiting and muscle and joint aches.

When should I call the doctor about tick bites?

Call your doctor if:

  • Your child has had a tick bite, especially if the tick might have been on the skin for more than 24 hours. Sometimes, doctors prescribe a preventive dose of antibiotics for kids at high risk for Lyme disease.
  • Part of the tick remains in the skin.
  • A rash of any kind develops (especially a red-ringed bull’s-eye rash or red dots on wrists and ankles).
  • The bite area looks infected (increasing warmth, swelling, pain, or oozing pus).
  • Your child gets symptoms like a fever, headache, tiredness, stiff neck or back, joint swelling, or muscle or joint aches.
  • Your child has facial paralysis (can’t move areas of the face).

What do doctors do if you have Lyme disease?

A pediatrician may be able to diagnose Lyme disease based on a child’s bull’s-eye rash, or they might order a blood test.

If Lyme disease is confirmed, the doctor will prescribe an antibiotic, a medicine that kills the spirochetes, the bacteria carried by some ticks.



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